Wednesday, May 25, 2016

7 Things Marriage Has Taught Me

1) Your a team but teamwork takes practice
In a marriage you have to work together, together you are stronger and will accomplish more. But like any team sometimes you have to practice working together. As much as I would love to say that working together comes naturally once your married - unfortunately it doesn't.

2) Communication is key
I don't know about your house....but my husband & I like to stay very busy and active. This means that I might not see my husband all day everyday so we have to communicate and let the other person know what's going on, where we are, who's responsible for making dinner that night, who's going to make sure they stop by the bank and pay the bills on time, who's going to be at home waiting for service call, ect. The only way a busy household can function effectively is if you communicate with each other.

3) Date night is still important
This is something that I like is so important. If your house is like ours and you are busy, busy, busy, it's good to take a night off together and go on a date night. It doesn't have to cost you a lot of money. Just staying in and having one person cook a romantic meal followed by a walk is nice. Sometimes you have to put the pause button on life and reconnect with your significant other. Catch up with them and ask how has their week been. Help them resolve any issues they may have stumbled across and praise them for all the hard work they've put in. I feel like some couples miss this step and they are so busy and wrapped up in what they are doing they sometimes forget to connect with their partner which can cause issues down the road.

4) Fight fair
Every couple has fights....if anyone claims they don't fight with their significant other than they are lying. A lot of couples fight differently, I know when I fight with my husband we don't tend to yell or throw things. We fight pretty civil but sometimes we get very heated and passionate about what we are fighting about and very hurtful words will come out of our mouths that we really don't mean. When you get into a heated argument present your side and why you are so passionate about it but also let your partner express their side. No one can win all the time - remember to compromise. If you find yourself at a dead end agree to take a 5min break - take a break and revisit the argument, sometimes you just need a few min to think about it and come up with an alternative solution

5) Show your appreciation
You are in this marriage together. It's nice to be appreciated for your hard work and effort so if you want your appreciation acknowledged then show your appreciation for your partner. Thank them for the little things they do that contribute to your household. Anything from picking up milk, unloading the dishwasher, mowing the lawn, washing your car, vacuuming, ect.

6) Life sometimes doesn't go as planned
I feel like this is the universes cruel joke. I feel like every time I make a plan something happens to derail us. Our vehicle brakes down, someone gets sick, the weather doesn't cooperate, the event we were going to gets cancelled. I guess after having an unpredictable life like ours you learn to let things go and try to laugh about it - I mean what else am I supposed to do? The old version on myself would have breakdown when plans fell through - the new me lets the little things go and moves with the flow. Instead of dwelling on the bad I try to problem solve and figure out what to do instead.

7) Support your spouse for who they are
My husband is who he is, I can't change that and nor would I want to. I feel in love with him for who he is and not who I wanted him to be. Yes he does things that annoy me....I'm sure I do many things that annoy him too...but those little things are part of the package and I love him for who he is. I feel that is it very important to support your spouse for who they are. Any goals or life dreams they have should be encouraged - never screw up your nose at your spouses dream no matter how out there their goals may be.

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